Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
i think i have herpe
just one?
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
