it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
