I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
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There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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