think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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