are you so shy because you have an std?
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
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