Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
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His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
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