he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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