guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision