idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed