He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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