I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
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