She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
a search helicopter?!
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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