come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
