So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
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