We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
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