I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Randomize
