I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
