i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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