It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
