This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize