maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
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