The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
He shit in the fireplace
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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