Ambien. No doubt about it.
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Randomize
