next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Randomize
