You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
