did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Randomize