drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
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