i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
