There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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