Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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