Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
