One girl and one boy is just not enough.
The best revenge is premature balding
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Randomize
