trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
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