Texts From Last Night

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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.

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  (973): Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie. http://tfl.nu/rlm3
  Replies (20) Good night (2437) Bad night (647)
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  (334): View more from Alabama

  Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?

  (1-334): View more from Alabama

  You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.

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  (334): Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating? (1-334): You are proof that most things are best left unsaid. http://tfl.nu/quhe
  Replies (31) Good night (929) Bad night (5033)
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  (870): View more from Arkansas

  Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.

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  (870): Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine. http://tfl.nu/j38c
  Replies (56) Good night (5632) Bad night (1239)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  "auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made

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  (404): "auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made http://tfl.nu/y4iq
  Replies (23) Good night (799) Bad night (4636)
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  (810): View more from Michigan

  Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.

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  (810): Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game. http://tfl.nu/d2ha
  Replies (20) Good night (579) Bad night (4057)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."

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  (610): i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there." http://tfl.nu/12yv
  Replies (28) Good night (6895) Bad night (711)
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"

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  (505): These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?" http://tfl.nu/1vuh
  Replies (8) Good night (1293) Bad night (3505)
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...

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  (843): Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks.... (843): I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one... http://tfl.nu/xuml
  Replies (12) Good night (3948) Bad night (775)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.

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  (617): I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits. http://tfl.nu/9n54
  Replies (10) Good night (1447) Bad night (3480)
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  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.

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  (321): Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class. http://tfl.nu/1es6
  Replies (7) Good night (3861) Bad night (699)
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.

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  (216): I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast. http://tfl.nu/0c0z
  Replies (4) Good night (2127) Bad night (519)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.

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  (503): ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help. http://tfl.nu/liab
  Replies (9) Good night (995) Bad night (581)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.

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  (+44): I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze. http://tfl.nu/d2nt
  Replies (5) Good night (1169) Bad night (359)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.

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  (613): hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me. http://tfl.nu/dgyw
  Replies (2) Good night (499) Bad night (561)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing

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  (702): We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing http://tfl.nu/3hel
  Replies (0) Good night (336) Bad night (191)

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