You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
29 Of The Most Hilarious And Embarrassing Walks Of Shame Ever
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
These 23 Dudes Get Giddy From Dem Titties
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Sorry about my life...
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.