Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work