But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
