Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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