You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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