Whod you bang
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
