dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Randomize
