You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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