Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
