If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Randomize
