You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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