Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
They have beer where we have blood.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
