Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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