I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
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