so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
