i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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