R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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