I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize
