is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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