You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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